Maintaining Your Home

Sermon Notes from last Sunday's Celebration Service...

One day mother was out and dad was in charge. Someone had given the little 2 year old a little 'tea set' as a gift. Daddy was in the living room engrossed in the evening news and brother was playing nearby, and here comes the little one bringing Daddy a cup of 'tea', which was just water.
After several cups of tea and lots of praise for such yummy tea, Mom came home. Dad made her wait in the living room to watch the little one bring him a cup of tea, because it was 'just the cutest thing!!' Mom waited, and sure enough, here comes the little one down the hall with a cup of tea for Daddy. Mom watches him drink it up, then says,
'Did it ever occur to you that the only place that baby can reach to get water is the toilet??'

we continue a new sermon series entitled…
INTEGRITY: CREATING HEALTHY BOUNDARIES

first we were reminded to
NEVER CONSIDER OURSELVES ABOVE TEMPTATION
We reveled in
JAMES 1
Then our focus was
Keep a close watch on your spiritual temperature
we reveled in Luke 8
took seven steps to self-control
took a purity pledge

This week
Let’s maintain our homes
In God’s Divine Order
Family comes before the church
Satan knows this and has done a wonderful job targeting the home, it’s a mess…

I recently came across some teaching by Ray and Marlene Pritchard...They have three family rules...
1. always tell the truth
2. always take care of your family
3. always do your best every single day
Isn’t that simple yet profound...

Many of us need to wake up to a simple truth
It’s a different world
Families in the 40s grew up with world war II and frank Sinatra
Families in the 50s grew up with black and white television and Elvis Presley
Families in the 60s grew up with Vietnam, violence in the streets and the Beatles
Families in the 70s grew up with disco and Charlies Angels
Families in the 80s grew up with cocaine, aids, Nintendo and Nightmere on Elm Street
Families in the 90s grew up with the simpsons, Monica Lewinsky, and Nirvana
Families of the 21st century are growing up with 9/11, ipods, American idol, south park, gay marriage, gratuitous violence gratuitous sex
It’s a different world

Psalm 127
Children are a heritage from God
a way of preserving the family into the next generation
The city gate was the place where men of power and influence conducted their business
If someone was falsely accused by adversaries at the gate
Children would stand and testify to their parents good name
God’s blessing is not on power or money or position
God’s blessing is not seen in worldly wealth or the accumulation of things but in a happy family that rallies to the call in time of trouble...
I am not speaking against a career or working hard
But giving a plea for balanced priorities and recapturing the highest value, the value of home and family and a commitment to a healthy marriage
Children, parents, marriage, home it’s both a burden and a blessing

Where are the really great families in the bible?
the families whose children followed God and were obedient
where are the perfect marriages
Abraham?
Jacob?
Noah?
Moses?
Eli?
There are no perfect homes in the bible
doesn’t that give you much hope
no matter where you’ve been what you’ve done
You can begin again today
Today is a new beginning a new commitment to maintaining your home for the Glory of God

Children learn more through imitation than lectures
Hames Baldwin had it right when he said…Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them…
and David Bly said…Your children will become what you are; so be what you want them to be…
Maybe you’ve heard it said that home is where life makes up its mind…
Sometimes parents forget how powerful our seemingly small actions can be…

I ran across this poem called… When you thought I wasn’t looking…
When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw you hang my first painting on the refrigerator, and I wanted to paint another one…
When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw you feed a stray cat, and I thought it was good to be kind to animals…
When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw you make my favorite cake for me, and I knew that little thing are special things…
When you thought I wasn’t looking, I heard you say a prayer, and I believed there is a god that I could always talk to…
When you thought I wasn’t looking, I felt you kiss me goodnight, and I felt loved…
When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw tears come from your eyes, and I learned that sometimes things hurt, but it’s all right to cry…
When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw that you cared and I wanted to be everything that I could be…
When you thought I wasn’t looking, I looked and wanted to say thanks for all the thing I saw When you thought I wasn’t looking…

God is a better parent than we are
Let Him take over the rearing of your children and grandchildren
Somebody needs this breakthrough today
maybe your totally frustrated with your kid’s situation
Listen to the Lord say
You have got to love this child and let me be the parent. I’m a much better parent than you are. Let me take over…
There’s a certain point, especially when your children leave your home, when you need to be freed up to love and stop trying to change your child…
The greatest parenting happens on your knees

Then there’s a whole new ball game of dealing with a prodigal child
Your greatest resource is ofcourse the amazing grace and forgiveness found in Jesus’ parable
But here are three verses that will help you in praying for the prodigals
Proverbs 4:23…Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life…
Proverbs 21:1…The king’s heart is in the hand of the LORD, like the rivers of water; He turns it wherever He wishes…
Ephesians 1:18…I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened…
We cannot compel the prodigal sons and daughters obedience because we cannot compel their hearts. But we can pray and cry out to God and say LORD OPEN THE EYES OF HIS/HER HEART SO THAT SHE/HE CAN SEE JESUS!
The first change needs to happen in us.
We musn’t become bitter, offended, angry, hardened toward any prodigal
the smallest offense kept in our hearts is a foothold for satan
the change we seek in others must start in our heart first
Do you have a child, or a grandchild far from the Lord, any family member
Don’t give up
keep on praying
Keep believing
you never know what God will do
LORD OPEN THE EYES OF HIS/HER HEART SO THAT SHE/HE CAN SEE JESUS!

There is so much to maintaining the home
so much to creating healthy boundaries
a home filled with integrity has to start with a good marriage
I will try not to get up on a soapbox about divorce
cause I know there is a lot of hurt in this room from families torn apart… abuse, neglect, pain
But that musn’t stop me from preaching marriage
It’s God’s idea
truth is, our world’s poor handling of the marriage bed
or complete disregard for commitment all together
has created such mess
the family unit is broken

Many marriages today suffer from a treatable disorder
It’s called M.A.D.
Minor Annoyance Disorder
The drip drip drip of marital conflict can cause permanent damage if not dealt with
Remember that marriage is the very close union of two sinners, a man and a woman who are still far from perfect. Even though we are new creations in Christ, we aren’t perfected yet. and most of us aren’t even close!
Where two sinners live together, you are bound to have friction…
Try thanking God for the things that irritate you. God uses that friction for a purpose. you must need it or God wouldn’t allow it…
Pick your battles carefully…not every hill is worth dying on…
Some things are never going to change.
Give God time to work things out…
You can’t change another person’s heart…
Remember that marriage is one of God’s major tools for your sanctification.
Don’t be a grievance-keeper
Ask God to give you amnesia about some things…
When you are wrong, admit it
Ask God to help you become a speedy forgiver
Truth is, some seemingly good marriages end in divorce because sometimes small problems ignored get bigger

Here’s three Bible verses that will change your marriage
And don’t check out on me if you’re not married cause this stuff applies to every relationship
Ephesians 4:29…Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers…
The greek construction of this vers is a bit unusual
The verse opens with a greek word that means all, each every
the word meaning no occurs later in the verse
that give a particular emphasis to these words
every critical comment that comes out of your mouth NO
every filthy word that come out of your mouth NO
every harsh word that comes out of your mouth NO
every cheap shot that comes out of your mouth NO
Every bit of gossip NO

remember Proverbs 18:21 the tongue has the power of life and death
stop cursing your home by the words that protrude out of your face
speak words that build up instead of tear down
speak words that minister grace
all the time in ever circumstance
every word all good all grace all the time

and the third verse is 1 Peter 4:8…Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins…
Here’s a simple interpretation of that verse
BE QUICK TO FORGIVE THE STUPID THINGS PEOPLE DO
the word deeply might be better translated fervently
it means stretched-out love
It’s what happens when your child does wrong and you stretch out your arms to embrace them anyway

Every time someone wrongs me I have two choices. I can deal with it, forgive it, cover it and move one, or I can drag that person through the mud and in hatred stir up all kinds of dissension. love refuses to wash its dirty laundry in public
Love handles it privately, it goes out of its way to treat it discreetly…it is exactly the opposite of hatred that exposes weakness and humiliates someone else. Love deals with sin publicly only as a last resort!
First there is love, then there is forgiveness, then there is silence. Love has a short memory and sealed lips. We need to hear this word because others will indeed fail us a multitude of times…
LOVE isn’t surprised when close friends fail, isn’t surprised when promises aren’t kept, isn’t surprised when others write unkind letters and isn’t surprised when we are criticized unfairly
Fervent love expects others to fail, expects to be hurt and expects to be used unfairly…
IT GOES ON LOVING ANYWAY…

Don’t let things build up between you and others
Don’t let the sun go down while you are angry Ephesians 4:26 says and 27 explains why so as to not give the devil a foothold
Thank God for what he has given you
instead of focusing on what you don’t have
Take time to praise those God has placed around you
look hard for things to praise instead of criticize
Remember we’re in a marathon not a sprint
Pace yourself
Maintaining your home is one day at a time
Creating healthy boundaries is one day at a time
Integrity is one day at a time
Leaning on Jesus, practicing His word